Saturday 6 June 2015

(Movie) Get ganked! A look at Seventh Son

When I started watching this, I was expecting something along the lines of Eragon or a live action Tales of Earthsea.

Instead, I got a medieval Supernatural movie.

While I did like the show at one point, I don't feel as though this movie lived up to its hype.

I shall explain why herein.

*Equips Hammer of Smiting*

Story/Dialogue: To summarise this story, it's about a young man who is the seventh son of a seventh son. He takes on the apprenticeship of a Falcon Knight; a legendary hunter of monsters. The Seventh son, Tom, then ends up falling for a monster.
I had high hopes for this movie.
The dialogue was extremely dry and knowing that Jeff Bridges is in it kind of takes you out of the world. He's not a character wearing Jeff Bridges' face. He's just Jeff Bridges with a speech impediment. Mr. Bridges basically played his character from R.I.P.D.
This movie felt like a fantasy novel written by someone who binge watched Supernatural in a week and stopped at the episode where they got to be knights.

The writers of this film had all the answers, but didn't spend enough time building the world, or bothering to create characters worth caring about.

I do not pity Tom, nor do I hope that he gets the girl. I do not care if his master dies. I don't care.

As Andrew Stanton (Pixar) once said: "Make me care"

https://www.ted.com/talks/andrew_stanton_the_clues_to_a_great_story?language=en


Cinematography: The best thing about this movie by far was the CGI. Watching Julianne Moore turn from dreadlocked dragon to devilish dame flawlessly was a wonderful sight to behold. There were moments where the movie felt poorly cut, (i.e the Boggart scene. I had no idea what was going on.) but the framing kept everyone out of the boring zone. (Centre frame is considered boring by most.)
Other than that, there isn't that much more to add.

Audio: Frankly, the audio stayed in the background, like a thief at night. It felt more like a space filler rather than something that could have been epic and stood out. While not every movie needs songs that make you want to purchase the soundtrack, I love finding songs like that. Musical scores always add that little bit extra for me and I just didn't find that in this movie.


Overall: Say something for this story, it tried. It did something a little different. But this is what you get when you try and stuff a clown car with an elephant. It just doesn't work. There's so much going on and you can't keep track of it all, much less care about the characters. There's no explanation as to why seventh sons of seventh sons are so important and even if this was an adaptation, I do not believe in, "read the book," as an excuse.

Frankly, that's disgraceful.

The CGI, however impressive, could not carry the weight of terrible storytelling. You cannot polish a turd.
There is little to no suspension of disbelief, which any good story possesses. Jeff Bridges sees to that with his atrocious acting.
It's even more important when you have an epic fantasy tale on your hands. You have a world to build, characters to fill out and you need to SHOW it rather than tell it.

I don't give a shit if the guy is a seventh son of a seventh son. TELL ME WHY.

MAKE ME CARE, DAMN IT!

TWO STARS!

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