(Classic) (Movie) Holey Quest.....A look at Monty Python and the Holy Grail.

This is the first review of Classics month. In which I review a classic movie a week.

First I will say this.

I'm not typically a fan of Monty Python movies.

Whether it's because I don't understand most British humour or I try to follow a story that is so far in front of me that I miss it.

The first time I watched this film, I found myself dragged along on an adventure with King Arthur, king of the Britons and his quest to find the holy grail.

Let's get on with it, shall we?

Story/Dialogue: The story takes a back seat, in that King Arthur, king of the Britons, is out trying to find knights to join him at his round table. After he abruptly finds them all, he decides that Camelot...his home, is far too silly to reside in. So God comes forth and tells King Arthur, king of the Britons to locate the Holy Grail.

Also, someone has murdered a historian. Police are investigating.

The dialogue is witty and leaves you in a state of shaking shoulders and breathless laughter. It also makes it exceedingly difficult to write this bloody review! Furthermore, your have characters trying to sing and an argument over the savageness of a rabbit.


Cinematography: The film was shot in Scotland (An observation, not a judgement). The indoor scenes were well lit and pretty much everything was covered in straw. I found myself remarkably dumbfounded by seeing the inside of EVERY castle covered in straw.
With this said, visually, this movie is excellent. From the animations to the flying predator rabbit they are both cheesy and excellent for the setting.

Audio: There are a few musical numbers in this which were excellent to listen to. Overall the audio created a sense of epicness while also cutting off at points to snap you out of it and laugh.

Overall: My advice would be to watch this movie as though it were an hour and a half long Saturday Night Live skit. If you treat it as though it were something to get immersed in, you will be pulled out constantly when the characters start talking about the rights to power and consulting a manual on the holy hand grenade of Antioch.

I give this movie 4 and a half stars.

(Movie) Havin' a ball! (But only 'til midnight)....a look at Cinderella.

Walking out of the cinema, I found myself a little disappointed....


BY THE LACK OF COLOUR IN THE OUTSIDE WORLD!!!! Holy crap was that movie was so colourful!!! It was like watching a mantis shrimp getting into a fistfight with a unicorn.

In any case, this movie is the live action retelling of a young girl who was abused by her stepmother and two sisters, only to end up at a ball and win the heart of a monarch.

I feel that this time, they did it so much better.


Story/Dialogue: Some of you may be asking if it stayed true to the original story. For the most part, I would say yes. However, they did include extra parts in it which only improve the original story. One example is when Ella and Kit meet early on in the movie. Adding this in made so much more sense and a whole lot less creepy later on in the movie. There are other little things, like Kit asking instead of ordering her to marry him.

But by far one of my favourite parts of this movie is Ella herself. She's a well rounded character who can be kind and still smack you down without seeming arrogant or obnoxious. Seeing her break, only to become stronger as a result and still maintain her kindness only made her more appealing.

With this said, the exposition at the beginning was rather slow to start. I found myself groaning at the narration and the, 'I must get everything out in a single breath so that you learn something,' lines.

That was one of my only beef with the movie, honestly.

The actors performed wonderfully. Cate Blanchett is fantastic at being anything she steps into. Hayley Atwell left too soon, in my opinion. Overall, the story, dialogue and characters were wonderful.


Cinematography: For this part, not only will I cover the lighting, framing and angles, but the CGI.

Visually, this movie was a sensory wet dream. The colours were rich, the lighting grand and the framing tight.

It had the grand scale of the Great Gatsby, but most, if not all of the characters were likeable in some way or another.

The symbolism of the natural robin's egg blue of Cinderella's dress versus the artificial colours of her step sisters was a nice touch.

Whatever team performed that epic transformation from pumpkin to carriage should be given all the awards. That scene could only be described as, 'Magical.' The animators of this film did an amazing job at transitioning each of the animals and the dress! Seeing that blew me away.


Audio: There's something about audio that makes visuals so much more intense.
Listening to upbeat music with bright colours around makes them seem brighter. Sinister or sad music makes the colours seem dull.

They interweave with each other and it's a delight when both audio and visual are in perfect harmony.

However, one thing that struck me odd is that the audio track sometimes didn't match up to the mouth movements.

This was my other beef.

Overall: This movie was an absolute delight to watch. Visual and audio candy. Aside from those two hiccups aforementioned, this movie was as pristine as the glass slipper fitted to Ella's foot.

5 stars.

(Book) Growing Pains...A look at Chasing Shadows Everywhere

This book advertised itself as, 'Catcher in the Rye meets Fight Club.'

I'll be completely honest. I ate this book up.

As a young man, I identified with Holden Caulfield very much so. I had a hatred for things that were, 'phony' and I spent so much time trying to be real.

While I never identified with the characters of Fight Club, I understood how the status quo of society made the life seem pointless and repetitive and set up an expectation to exist rather than live.

In this mashup, we witness a young man named Jake trying to find his way in the world. He's a coward and a decent enough kid, but he wants to be more.

Enter his cousin Nick. To Jake, Nick is a guy who gets what he wants because he fights for it so savagely.

I found the stream of consciousness to be both informative and entertaining. Jake rarely makes light of the situations he ends up in, but his raw honesty is refreshing and makes it easy for you to identify with the character.

Observing Jake try to survive the status quo, the dreams he has and the anomalies that he faces can at times be jarring, but that's what makes the book so fascinating.

What I got from Chasing Shadows Everywhere is going out and getting what you want, instead of waiting around for future events to take place.

The book is worth reading and analysing. Finally, it is also worth rereading.

5 stars.

(Movie) Space NOPEra....a look at Jupiter Ascending.

In writing this review, I have been told by my brother that I have committed a sin by watching a post-Matrix Wachowski movie.

(Personally, I enjoyed Speed Racer. I think people were just mad because it wasn't like the Matrix.)

May this review absolve me of my sin.

*Equips Hammer of Smiting*

The story follows a young woman by the name of Jupiter Jones, who is apparently of royal lineage to a family who own a business empire that harvests humans for their DNA. This is so they can preserve their bodies and stay alive for enormous amounts of time.

Story/Dialogue: Aside from the overview above, the story itself is relatively easy to follow, even if you're not paying attention. With this, it's like an episode of Neighbours. For this segment I have two issues.
1. You have a well rounded female character who at times comes off as a Mary Sue and yet at others plays a damsel in distress. JUPITER JONES HAD SO MUCH POTENTIAL and yet you made her this inconsistent character who at one point has a photographic memory and then never uses it again. Then at other times she can fight her older brother/son (This will tie in to my second point,) while similarly hide behind her wolf/angel/inline skater bodyguard when things get crazy. I can understand being scared, but having a lump of broody muscle tell this strong female character to get behind him seems like a slap in the face, quite frankly. It makes it difficult to cheer on a character who is so inconsistent.

2. WHY THE FLYING FRACK DO YOU HAVE A CHARACTER TRYING TO MARRY HIS MOTHER/LITTLE SISTER!? 
Look, when Boston Legal did it, that was for legal stuff and they were friends. This movie took that same concept and made it SO dang creepy. It doesn't even matter if it's reincarnation. Watching a wedding between siblings/mother & son is just...no. That's not okay.


Cinematography: This is where the movie shone. Visually it is beautiful and rather reminiscent of John Carter (On a visual basis). The CGI was exquisite and the places were wonderful to look at. With that said, I found myself disgruntled by watching Channing Tatum and Sean Bean flying around in discount Gundams. The lighting was excellent and some of the shots in this movie were beautiful.


Audio: While the music didn't stand out in a big way, the choirs during the 'epic battles' added tension to the fight. They made the fights bearable to watch. I think I just enjoy choirs for final fights. I know I'd have a choir in my final fight sequences.


Overall: In reviewing this movie I found a world that had been beautifully crafted, but didn't allow outsiders into it. What I mean is that anything that is going on for the short time that Jupiter goes anywhere off world is rather glazed over. This movie suffers from what I'm now calling, 'Maze Runner Syndrome.' (In that they have an exclusive club of terminology and unless you endure the long expositional initiation, you are forever on the outside.)
My belief is that the Wachowskis have an issue with trilogies. They give us all this information in hope that they can provide better sequels, but since people struggle with anything that isn't the Matrix, they won't get the fanbase needed to have a sequel greenlit.

Furthermore, creating non-existent chemistry between two characters is a horse that has long been beat. Hollywood is literally beating bones, now.

With this in mind, I give this movie 2 stars.

(Book) Werewolves, Witches and Ogres, Oh My!! A look at Junior Inquisitor

Firstly, I must apologise to the author as this review is a couple of weeks in the making.

Now, with this in mind...

Junior Inquisitor follows the story of Brother Sebastian, who is chasing down his missing Catholic brethren in Providence, Rhode Island.

I forgot to mention that Brother Sebastian is an Inquisitor; a holy man who fights all manner of things that go bump in the night.

Now, as this was a new author for me to read, I was a tad slow to start with the exposition that I had to read through. You learn about Sebastian and why he's an Inquisitor in the first place, etc.

What I did not expect was the stakes to be raised so high, so quickly.

One minute I'm watching Sebastian talk to a priest, the next we're in a firefight with a Voodoo woman who leaves her psycho dollies around to taunt people with their malicious madness.

The stakes only becomes greater from there!

Lincoln S. Farish has crafted a tale that shoves you face first down a rabbit hole, only to find that halfway down the tunnel is now caving in.

One of my favourite parts are the conversations between Father Arnold and Sebastian. It allows for the reader to see who Sebastian is, as opposed to simply what he tells us.

The story is intense, brutal and the extended cast of characters are not only likeable, but they enhance the presence of Brother Sebastian. The creatures are well thought out and sparse enough that it implies a rise to power in later books.

This book is well researched and its pacing is that of vengeful demon on the heels of the wicked.

On the surface, this may look similar to the Dresden Files, a dash of Hellsing and a sprinkle of Supernatural for good measure. But it is so much more than that.

A fantastic book and I'm very much looking forward to the next instalment.

5 Stars.

The book is available for download at Google Play and its Apple equivalent. Worth the purchase.